Archive for the ‘Suffering’ Category

Fri Sept 20

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– all the kids coming over and sitting w me on the kitchen floor to eat their breakfast too
– our living room, less cluttered than it’s ever been!
– my friend in my kitchen, cooking something delicious for us while I told her some of my glory stories- everything God’s been doing in my life the last few years except for Texas and God’s most recent miracle
– kids discovering a brand new awesome playground: the skatepark 🙂
– baby turtle show on Netflix , so cute 🙂
– sleeping baby snuggled under a warm blanket
– big kid riding circles around the driveway
– phone call w a political rep and a chance to have my voice heard

– more evidence of God’s wisdom and power w this move

Sat Sept 21

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– roofing day…DH is helping my friend repair the roof of her house, alongside some Franciscan brothers..
– people I love up on a roof

– at last, superman got his flying dinosaur!
– foam Dino’s in their n64 world
– boys arriving at the fair
– my little superman pitcher scoring himself both chips AND pop w bean bags
– our first scavenger hunt, together we came in 2nd!
– 3 boys, even the littlest in a bouncy castle

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– blue sharks splashing in the pool
– the grace of actually being prepared! Sweaters and everything)
– boy’s all tied up in a hammock, swinging way up high w/O falling out
– hazy harbour scene

Sun Sept 22

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– grace here, kneeling on the floor on my pajamas, and w DH still there in bed
– beautiful day, windy but warm

– my little superman’s decision that he would share his love w a friend, and how that hug softened an angry little heart

– baby w his ride-on, scooting all around the driveway, using it as transportation from the steps to the car

– an angel looking down from the clouds
– egg puff w broccoli AND cauliflower
– lesson planning, jumping in w both feet, and w the help of the Holy Spirit figuring out how to work all the weeks while still coordinating the special days w their corresponding lessons ( and this sorting the rest of the weeks out)
– my ‘bday present’ from superman
– a sea of egg cartons

– my oldest watching intently as priests spoke about being a real man after Christ etc…
– my big kid really into the praise w his drum arms
– the incredible blessing of being here and receiving You, twice today
– my oldest rockin’ it on the drums
– our schoolroom all tidy and ready for the first day 🙂

Mon Sept 13 First Official Day of Kindergarten

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– tiny little bums sticking up as sleepy kids roll over
– ‘Are you sleeping’, kid wake up music!
– cool fresh morning, clouds on the way out
– superman deciding to say his prayers all on his own
-w/o the distraction of praise music FIRST thing, breakfast on the table just after 8!

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– perfect first day photos, outside and w his brothers in front of the dino wall
– DH coaching our oldest to draw mountains as practice for the letter A
– DH right away seeing what I no longer noticed: that the table was too high and our son would do much better in the school desk!
– while I was working w my school kid to draw a picture of himself- DH got out the bath foam letters and was helping the littler ones stick them to the wall! So creative 🙂
– my son’s 1st self portrait ( w a little help) complete w monster hands
-the moments where DH was helping his son w school or working magic w the younger two- everything he brought to our homeschool and our day, worth the frustration of having him home w us today 🙂

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– tiny tot curled up on the couch
– a re-do trip to the skatepark, to document the excitement 🙂
– a first day picnic at our skatepark playground
– superman running fast fast!
– fall baby walking in fall leaves

– superhero story time w daddy and his boys
-‘Because of his quackness…. ‘ 🙂

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– baby flying up and down the road on his ride-on toy
– daddy riding on the back and even pulling a wheelie w superman on the tricycle
– family bike time, and my oldest getting faster and faster

– coloured layers in the evening sky
– a beautiful opening prayer service
– w a reception, perfect since I had missed dinner!
Wow, we are so blessed to have what we have w our inlaws, whenever we need something they have been there, and somehow, across great divides, we are all Christ to each other.
– surrender, and God’s timing

Tues Sept 24

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– I’m thankful that I get more Cheerios! ( j)
– – that we get to do 1 page in who Am I today ( T)
– ty for making a beautiful Cheerio tree

– going through some of our school opening even before everyone’s done breakfast when necessary…it helps when we’re running late

– folding diapers while my son practiced his letter As 🙂
– a wonderful meditation, on working out our salvation, and just what God wanted to share w someone on my FB 🙂
– deep green couch and stripes in the cozy blanket,and a perfect spot for a nap

-surprise, a kitty curled in the grass
– spontaneous kitty love 🙂
– the cat that would not leave my side as I walked on, so I told it to come along, and it did
– the kitty walking before me like an angel
-it followed me all the way home, NEVER LEAVING MY SIDE

Wed Sept 25

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– 2 boys attentive w missals
– praying like the woman w the hemorrhage, if I but touch him
– morning prayer of trust from the depths of my soul before Jesus
-our missing blankie, spotted by my oldest on a shelf at church
– baby goldfish feet

– kid sanctioned/initiated quiet rest time
– boy’s snuggled up watching dinosaurs
– my big kid discovering a great affinity for fresh peas, shelling every one he could get his hands on- and eating them all too
– lesson planning from the couch

– love persisting, and hope that kept fighting, despite the evidence
– the boys left to play w DH’s buddy, just the 4 of them 🙂
– an IV bag being squeezed by a blood pressure pump
– That God lets me know about these major events ahead of time, even giving idea of when they will occur, such that I know so clearly that He is in it and behind it
– new experiences: riding in an ambulance to get to the other hospital
– unconditional love all around me in my time of need
– a sweet gesture from DH’s friend, a link to some comforting bible verses
– my sweet SUMITES ( and mom too) lifting me up w words of love and in prayer
– at last freedom to go home and rest

Thurs Sept 26

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– coming into nanny’s room, a little brighter and inviting, a tiny gift of hope
– baby brought me a pirate ship to sail the blanket sea 🙂
– my SUM sisters walking by my side through all of this w words of love and divine wisdom
– breakfast in bed, delicious apple pancakes
-Oh Lord, I thank You for making Your ways so clear to me.
-morning rest: prayer, love over fb, and some music to help me feel better

-3 boys w playdoh…
– a lunch date w just DH and baby
– light but hearty lunch
– baby giving me a horseshoe fry
-out the window, a dome-like globe in the sky, as I continued to think about our ‘miracle baby’

– beads for a special project
– words and messages of love and hope all around me
– a spontaneous hunt for apple pie, just because we can


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Fri Jul 19
– a much needed good night’s sleep
– an egg spaceship
– rosary on nanny’s couch
– all my guys big and small working on a puzzle

– money to do things for our house!
-droplets with blue on beige brown and droplets with brown on dark blue

– boy’s in their new makeshift hangout space in the basement
– finding the right spot for dishes, glasses and silverware
– a cross now standing high over my kitchen sink
– my oldest excitedly bringing me his plant

– a chorus of shouts of ‘yes!’ to God in the back seat
– an adventure of discovery
– Horton!
– giant lobsters and hippos swimming under water
-2 floating heads!
– kids multiplying in the mirror
– buckets and buckets of Lego
-Baby with the display headphones
– building and engineering session for mummy

– Finally learning the secret to Guacamole, soft avocados!
-fresh fish on ice, gifts from the sea
– free samples!
– Mexican fiesta for dinner, this time with guacamole!
-The bridge in the fog

Sat Jul 20
– our new green bathroom
– baby surrounded by dollar bills
– baby helping daddy w the bunk beds and green tape
– a very green room
– boy’s sitting on the front porch
– a lamp left in our hallway just like the one from Pixar
– this house has the cross doors!!

– a way of surrender for him not to be late
– mattresses in the basement, we’ll sleep our first night in this house, in the basement
– grace I didn’t expect, God brought him back to me one last time – for a sleeping bag

– The tremendous gift of my SUMite sister to lift Me, my husband up in prayer and encouragement…
– an airplane in the basement
-middle son sitting quiet and sad for timeout ( unlike his brother at that moment)

– looking up from our new back deck to see a clear feather cloud
– Surrendering to His plan, whatever the outcome, everything, laid down for The Lord and for my husband.
– trust in Him and Him alone

– clouds like doves in the sky
– a great feather quill scrawling clouds across the sky
– a GREAT dove with one huge wing, wrapped over me
-my middle son when I told him to look up at the clouds looking up, exclaiming, ‘wow, they look like feathers!

– meeting the neighbours, she was just delighted that we moved in there, with the littles
– a contractor who worked on our house come by to personally offer his services

– super bike boy
– 3 boys w a mattress in the basement of our new house!
-grace on grace tonight.. DH and the other work party
– bedtime story snuggles w baby
– bible readings, keeping vigil through the night
– middle son saying the psalm response while drifting off to sleep, eyes closed: ‘God’s love is everlasting’
– gospel- conspired against him, when aware of this he departed…
– the bright white light, shining down the street
– th for walking with DH, and for walking with me through my SUM sister and the clouds.

Sun Jul 21

– smiley baby in a very good mood after a good night’s sleep
– baby trying to play with his sleeping big brother
– middle son, holding super bunny by the ears
– cloud rays of hope coming from behind the neighbours’ house
– kids eating cereal at the tiny superhero house table
– superman saying his prayers to Jesus in my kitchen
– boy’s sitting together eating breakfast in the driveway
– doves overhead
– lemon topped English muffin
– family chalk session
– chalking out the beauty from the night before
– a dove for a friend
-Great sweeping dove-like clouds
– great hope and joy in HIM
– an open door to sunshine at the end of the hall
-boys running a business, behind a great desk

– discovering my beautiful crucifix is special, and old
– a great dove over the church parking lot

– a tough opening for tough love
– the HS to guide me when I felt completely lost
– Mumford and sons, loud music to get me through, and Jesus to hold me
– hope in my pain, this is part of something greater/bigger

– a place to come home to
– the big crucifix, still with me in my purse, God, still with me.
– my newest little nephew to brighten my day
– baby didn’t kick me, that was a feet high 5 on the cheek! Aww!
– savoury devilled eggs
– my little guy in the tiny baby seat
– my brother’s childhood friend all grown up, holding the baby
– fun w sookies!
– a tiny baby to cuddle during my hour of mercy prayer time
– a garden sanctuary
–story time w Anthony, a gift of laughter when I needed it most
– strawberry mouse and sunken dinosaurs
– little sleeping baby, all wrapped up

– Mass, again, a source of great comfort and strength
– the hard gift of resembling Jesus, who willingly entered into his Passion.
– a scribble page on which my son wrote his name
– The blue cross, still with me, mom able to open it up and show it off

– apology on my phone
– boy’s tucked in on a mattress in the basement, one at each end
– the perfect bedtime story for this night, I’ll love you forever
– middle son, in dreamland already
– clear guidance from the HS, ‘he descended into hell, on the third day he rose again’

Mon Jul 22

-Fan of feathers in the sky
– a great cross in the clouds
– the beauty of trust
– baby on the toddler scooter
– my oldest w a buddy playing in the splash pad

– songs on the radio that gave hope and voice to my soul
– a tangible sign of commitment and love, a trip to the hardware store for green painting tape
– juice packs and pitas, God’s provision, food to grab and go
– dropping Jesus off at home

– a moment so surreal, the kids and I walking into a hotel
– God’s extravagant provision
– boy’s jumping on the beds
– my oldest, looking out the window and shouting excitedly, we’re in Canada!!!
– my intentional life shirt, along for this soul journey

-authenticity- a broken soul at a hotel window
– the beauty of pure sacrificial love
– boy’s tearing down the hall in search of the pool
– the perfect, single depth kiddie pool for them to play in
-a moment beginning to teach my oldest to swim
– a vast open air patio
– baby with his doggie friend
– being blessed to the point where I forgot I was sad
– little toddler wrapped in towels
– a great angel in the clouds
– bright photographic scenes in the elevator
– my best friend there at the desk, paying for our room, and my oldest, hanging from it

– playground evening picnic from my childhood, my best friend, unknowingly planning and recreating a favorite childhood memory for me
– my oldest and I catching up our rosary on the picnic table
– raw testimony, walking through my own passion before my best friend

– the moon full and round outside our window
– my oldest asleep with his feet tucked behind his head
– reading the last few chapters of winning him- I need all the wisdom I can get..
– and what should I have tucked in my book, but a Christmas card of the 3 boys and a photo of hubby, still there from when I brought them to share in Texas!
– how God prepares us ahead of time, to walk through all storms that we will face…
-words of hope from a friend, it’s all going to be okay.

Tues Jul 23

– awake and unable to sleep, time to pray and just to be alone with God
– bible intros, God’s love story
– words leaping of the pages of scripture, a message, for HIM.
– time alone, to grieve and pray in the quiet of night
– a blanket to wrap up in, Your arms around me
– all my prayer stuff spread on the windowsill before me like an altar of my love

– sunrise over the city
– a weathered feather scrawling in the sky
– Mary sweetness

– morning brother snuggles
– 3 boys looking out the window
– the perfect place to go
– complete abandonment to God, right by the main city roundabout
-all of us taking in the view from the 15th floor- people like ants and cars like dinkies

– little girl baby come to visit
– mommy and baby, both so beautiful
– little baby and my best friend joining us in the pool
– baby girl splashing
– no pool toys, no problem, we’ll use our croc shoes!
– croc shoes riding on flutter board boats
– indoor pool oasis
– the panels in the studio window framed a perfect cross

– praying by the ocean in the driving rain
– the final drive in
– spotting him a ways off, and running to him with open arms
– being ‘home’ again
– reaching out to show him love
– a shed that can be built in a day
– hardware samplers, shingles and tiny stone blocks
– Quiznos!
– boy’s eating subs in the back seat,
– holding hands

– time to really talk
– finding out the truth; that he wanted nothing to do with temptation because he loves ME.
-walking through it all with DH, on the way to healing
– forgiveness, reconciliation followed by an unexpected surprise
– amazing grace, God has used this to transform our marriage, we’ve never been more in love
– sharing with him how God was behind it all, and that none of this would have happened if I hadn’t been following God’s directions!
– wonder and awe at how God chose to bless my husband, and in a way he really could not ignore God’s role in it.

Wed Jul 24

-Grace upon grace- this time for BOTH of us!! What a resurrection!
– green and pink bathroom
– pikachu suspended from the swiffer
– morning prayer together w Jesus on the back deck
– harmony of alleluias
– baby reverently kneeling down before Jesus in the monstrance
-praising my heart out to the kid cd!
– my FIL calling to me excitedly the second I came in the door, and our old appliances free for the taking on kijiji 😉
– superman perched way up in the back of the seat

– a long chat with my heArt sister from church about everything God has been doing in our lives!
– the two of us, on our knees praying the divine mercy together in our living room!

– God’s NOT DEAD!!!
– an abundance of socks all matched up
– middle son tucked up in my bed
– the desks we were promised, still available now that I finally reached the lady who has them
-‘ Jesus just called you’ – DH. Good, because I couldn’t find him anywhere ( my phone)

Thurs Jul 25

-“as you listen to the birds”, JC opening as the birds were singing around me, God moment!
-my oldest counting to 300 to mark 5 min… ( made it to 112 slowly…)
– a strange creature emerged from the depths of our basement
– an article in flourish on woman, the glory of man

– 3 o’clock praise and worship before the blue cross
-A soul at my front door, during the hour of mercy. Instead of singing and praying this day I had put on music.
Right as I signed the papers, the words, ‘what can wash away my sin, nothing but the blood of Jesus!!!’ were echoing out of our home!

– hubby bracing the door open for groceries, letting my music be heard in the front yard 😉

– a big puddle in our driveway
– the kitchen garbage from right out of my thoughts- when we were looking at the house I had a vision of garbage and recycling bins side by side. Little did I know at the time that they could be found in the same container!!!
– starter prayer shelf in the kitchen cupboard

– sharing the blessing of our new house w my friend’s parents, and a little of how God was behind it all
– guacamole on my own, w cilantro, garlic and more lime mine was even better!
– boy’s saying bedtime prayers in our Mary blue living room to Jesus on the blue cross, on the mantle

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Josh Wilson – Carry Me

I try to catch my breath
It hasn’t happened yet
I’m wide awake in the middle of the night scared to death
So I prayed God, would You make this stop
Father please hold on to me, You’re all I’ve got

Carry me, carry me, carry me now
From my sinking sand to Your solid ground
The only way I’m ever gonna make it out
Is if You carry me, carry me, carry me now
God carry me, carry me, carry me now

Jesus calm my heart
Come near me please
Lord don’t let these worries get the best of me
Oh I believe, that You’re still here with me
Cause You meant what You said when You said You’d never leave

Carry me, carry me, carry me now
From my sinking sand to Your solid ground
The only way I’m ever gonna make it out
Is if You carry me, carry me, carry me now
God carry me, carry me, carry me now

Carry me
God carry me
Carry me
God carry me

I’m at the end of myself
I know I’ve got nothing left
Feels like I’m stuck in the valley of the shadow of death
And I’ve been down here so long
I just can’t find my way out
Oh God I don’t stand a chance
Unless You carry me now
God carry me now

Carry me, carry me, carry me now
From my sinking sand to Your solid ground
The only way I’m ever gonna make it out
Is if You carry me, carry me, carry me now
God carry me, carry me, carry me now

Carry me now
Carry me now
Carry me now
Carry me now

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Quick takes posted up from Texas!
Such is the power of the iPhone 🙂

3 things I’ve learned so far:
-1. At least when traveling west, the right side of the train/bus always has the best views (and I sat on the left every time)
-2. It makes a difference to ask the Lord’s help even in little personal endeavours. I wanted to take a photo of the night sky outside the plane but the light was so low it would take a very low shutter just to get anything close to capturing the beauty before me, and I was pretty sure It was well beyond my own capacity and that of my camera… but I tried anyway and I asked Jesus to hold the camera steady because I couldn’t and I have never been able to keep it that still for that kind of time frame without at least partially resting it on something.. And with His help I actually got a couple photos clear enough that did capture the incredible sight, though they don’t fully so it justice of course…
-3. Everything really is bigger in Texas!!!

I don’t have all 7 days worth with me because my Good Friday notes were all on paper. Also, I was pretty wiped yesterday and didn’t write anything yet…

Fri Mar 29 – Good Friday
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An accumulation of cans piled by DH’s computer desk
Baby out in the sunshine exploring outside for the first time
Red sword thorn
Kisses for Jesus

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Pretzel crosses stuck in bread, we remember
Pretzel paper man
Lone cross on sandwich hill
3 boys tucking in their baby and singing a lullaby of Jesus Loves Me
Pretzel rosary crucifix

Sat Mar 30

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No line at the bank the 2nd time
Getting through divine mercy- small miracle
at the last moment, remembering to get my keys from the counter at Chapters
Agony ( agonizing) in a fake garden
Beating pecans
A third small miracle, Finally remembering to take the box of Cheerios so I could put them in a donation box!

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A deep need to be at mass tonight
Vigil Darkness
Holy water showers
My Candle snuffed out when it and I were drenched w holy water
Daring to believe he rose again
That my Lord would do so much for me!! Go so far to love me
Paschal joy
the aroma of love again

Easter Sun mar 31

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The birds all a twitter
Praying the glorious mysteries again!
Deep symbolism in the addition of a simple white ribbon
Easter all over my house
2 cartons of eggs filled and ready to be hidden in the yard
Baskets of goodies
Bright coloured plastic eggs peeking out around our back yard

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Chocolate fingers ( and grabby hands too)
A stack cup Easter egg
Baby with my camera, say cheese Mummy!
Egg hunt in our backyard
Baby tripping with his Easter egg only to discover candy fell out
little hands holding plastic eggs with candy
Baby’s with his little basket

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Spring branches
Wiggly patches of grass
Easter snow
a leaf standing straight up in the snow, God saying hello to me 🙂
Time alone to walk with God in the yard from my childhood
The old climbing tree
Branches catching afternoon sun
Old forgotten hockey net

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Piggie at the window
Easter towers at each place
Trains in Grandma’s Easter baskets
The adopted piggie, they can’t WAIT to be parents lol
Brown sugar ham
Lemon ice cream and meringue cookies, next best thing to pie 🙂
Story Time
Theological discussion w my family surrounding Passover

Mon Apr 1

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Waving game
2 awesome online pranks (google and ‘in a relationship’)
Words of hope from SUM
Words of freedom from DH’s radio

Thick fog on the highway, Heading into the unknown
Watching baby play dinosaurs
Twilight and blue
The light from the door down the hall and the adventure baby and I start tomorrow 🙂

Texas Adventure Day 1, Tues Apr 2

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Ty for the gift of this day, wild with possibility!
Feeling a little better
Stepping into the sunlight

Baby all buckled up in the backseat going somewhere exciting!
My little guy chillin on the bench at the train station
Fond farewell to my mom at the station
DH coming by on his lunch break to see me off
Graffiti under the bridges
My little responsible passenger reading the safety pamphlet
Green lake
iPhone to entertain baby
Baby under the seat playing iPhone

Baby falling asleep looking out the train window
God moment as I read the first sentence of the SUM book
Tiny person walking tiny hallways
Rays of hope bursting in the sky
Slits in the clouds, hope wounds with light bursting through

Looking up to see a string of leaves blowing right into the window in front of me
baby iphone apps
Old love- an older man reaching his hand out to steady his wife on the swaying/moving train
Comfort food chicken soup w noodles from my childhood

Bedtime sillies-Baby giggling rolling on the seat beside me in his train jammies
Warped patches on the window glass
The sound of birds from 2 seats back
Peekaboo and a game of fetch with our friends on the train

Wed Apr 3 Day 2

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2 seats!!
Kind Man who offered to get me a coffee
Another gift, a delicious salmon and egg sandwich
Quiet time to read and let God teach me… Jesus friend of sinners…
My book – having it’s own adventure
Another kind gentleman, Noah’s buddy from 2 rows back, helping with my bags through the train station 🙂
Baby w his new buddy
Tall grass reeds poking out of the ice
Cute farms out the window
Snowman metal lunchbox (egg sandwich and cous cous salad)
Ty for providing for all my needs and MORE on this trip
Baby peekaboo in the netting cubby
Ty for locking me out of the iPhone so I don’t miss any of the encounters and opportunities You have for me
Blue and green coastal skyline
Kermit headphones
An opportunity to reach out and share God’s love and truth

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the resourceful / practical ingenuity of my inlaws
Tall buildings
Glimpsing an airplane between buildings, flying through downtown Toronto
CGI bushes??
A bunch of cranes all in one view
Baby in the baggage cart basket
US flight registration at last
Baby on the luggage scale- I think he’s around 20 pounds
Catholic customs officer
Passports and tickets, off we go!
That my husband doesn’t like reading, no worry of him reading much Dawkins…
Someone to help me carry everything every time I needed a little help
Airport at sunset

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Baby looking out the plane window in wonder
A Patchwork of snowy fields below
Cities through fog and twilight out the opposite window
Ginger ale, my fav on a plane
Entertainment for a 1 yr old toddler, a plastic cup and an ice cube
An opportunity to share my choice to walk with faith
Ty for providing for me and never leaving my side
Baby staying close and not running off so mummy could just rest between flights
The body of Christ everywhere-Fellow Canadians and followers of Christ in the Chicago airport
Finding A tiny orange truck in my coat pocket
Meeting a lovely Catholic couple, fascinated by the unequal marriage ministry
Rediscover Catholicism x2
Future Tyler and James w their dad
Every encounter, divinely ordained and planned out in advance by God!

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Watching an airplane just taking off, and actually catching it with my camera!!
A stand up comedian for a flight attendant
Flying a short distance on a clear night
City lights stretched out below like circuits on a motherboard
A sea of blue lights
Blue cold pills
Breathtaking night views
A fluffy white cloud floor and a vast / endless starry ceiling – a little like skyroads, a place of dreams
A steady hand, from outside of me-My camera held so steady by the hand of God
Actually Capturing a glimmer of the night beauty that lay before me
Praying powerfully on a plane
On Every leg of the journey, an empty seat for Jesus

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Houston cow of welcome
Peace from deep within as the cabbie and I searched for the house at 1 in the morning
Easter like Christmas
At 2am finally, a house with a light on
A Catholic hotel

Thurs Apr 4 Day 3

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A blue china bedroom
My book, with coffee and bathroom tissue; having its own adventure
Statues and other religious items everywhere
Ear popping good time (every time I blew my nose)
Cars camera
A present for each of my boys back home
coffee! Some days that’s all that will get you through, coffee and Jesus!
A lazy morning with a big leisurely breakfast
Catholic chat over coffee

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A beautifully decorated catholic home to photograph
A beautiful red cross
Little lamps, everywhere
A master bedroom like a chapel!
A most beautiful crucifix
Large windows and natural light
Baby in a house full of things he’s not supposed to touch
One curtain, not hanging quite right
Lovely queen of heaven – assumption statue
Baby excited to be set free to explore!
Learning all about this woman’s life, as a close friend

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Looking out the window into the backyard at the next house to see a trampoline!!
An Easter mantle complete with eggs and butterflies
A lantern of eggs
A dedicated kid space apart from the main living area
Photo identifying Lynn so I can access fb here in Texas
Being asked to identify my husband haha!

A house bustling with people and kids and activity
A love note on my iPhone from baby
Pastel spring flowers hanging from the chandelier
delicious homecooked dinner
Texas’ best BBQ sauce
Watching how their oldest took my toddler under her wing

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Mar 15

It’s just been a really tough week… I’m not complaining, at least I’m trying not to complain – to you, or to the people around me, and I don’t mind doing the work, I know DH is still feeling wiped compared to me.

I just need to know, I’m not alone. And I know You’re here but I need to know it…

Then I stepped out of the wind standing by the sunroom at the end of the trailer, and it was a sudden moment of comfort and shelter – and out there I was away from the chaos that lay inside again… that I had come out here to escape from for a little while – and I just sang, ‘shelter me oh God….’ From the wind, and from life. Shelter me, so I do not get dragged down with everything, but can continue to walk through it all in Your peace and freedom.

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Last night I read the suffering pamphlet that a friend had given me because I wanted a bit more strength to handle this ongoing flu

1 thing really stood out – to offer Jesus the very littlest sufferings – even those little interruptions…

‘5 minutes of suffering borne for love of Jesus is of greater value to us than years and years of pleasure and joy.’

‘When God gives us any suffering, He always gives us the strength to bear it, if we only ask Him. Many, instead of asking for His help, get excited and revolt. It is this excitement and impatience that really make suffering hard to bear.’

I have come to understand this truth for myself and it really is truth – it’s our fighting of things we can’t control that makes us so miserable!

‘An eminent physician in a conference which he gave to distinguished scientists and fellow doctors told them he owed all hi great success in life to the simple fact that he has corrected his habit of impatience and annoyance which had been destroying all his energy and activity. ‘

What possibility would open up to us if we should learn to do the same?

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I just stumbled onto this post through facebook, but these words have stuck with me.


“If all of life is either sacred or profane, the embarrassed and ashamed parts are where we have greeted the interruptions, the unexpected, the uninvited in a manner that is not sacred. They are the places where we’ve stumbled under the weight of the cross and instead of accepting the grace of the Savior, we’ve either tried to throw the cross from our shoulders or we’ve tried to carry it under our own strength.”

Elizabeth Foss : Hope for Fragmented Days

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