Offering the Sacrifice

For a long time I have been searching for an idea that can get me through the hard stuff… a promise that carries enough hope to see me through excruciating pain and all the absolute worst moments I have to go through.

But this is the first time I’ve found anything that has had such an impact and actually enabled me to say: w this promise clear in my heart I can face anything..

 

It all started just before this year’s annual jan fast week.

From the SUM blog:

“But this fast, which I started yesterday and plan to continue for 40 days, I intend to finally kill that god called appetite and offer my hunger as a living sacrifice. It is my offering to take captive my eating and then receive the reward that our Father gives to those who seek Him with all of their heart

So, when the hunger pangs strike, they will be my prompting to go to prayer. No matter where I am I will whisper a prayer to sustain me, take captive the pangs and tell my Father…. I am hungering and thirsting for righteousness and Father, fill me with YOU. I WANT YOU!

SUMites, let the pangs hit you. Pray upon those prompting pangs and seek this amazing mystery of hungering for righteousness because right behind the pangs, the GLORY ARRIVES! ”
“Let the hunger pangs hit you. The pangs are a call to prayer.”

These words were a breakthrough for me.

For me frustration, or loneliness, or just craving something sweet lol- all these are pangs, of a certain hunger too. Same when my kids are rude or defiant or  make a mess or even just when they want my attention when I’m busy w something.. All these are pangs, that give me something to offer to God. With every pang that hits, the way forward is to offer it in sacrifice- I just want more of You Jesus.

It’s transforming my thinking!  I was never okay w empty before- w not enough , w that lack, but now I have found I can be, because it makes way for more of Him!

Pang- look at the mess around me

Pang – argument w my husband

Pang- I just wish things could just be different and have it go my way

And w every one ( when I remember this) my heart beats anew- no, not what I want- clean, kind, kid to behave, hubby to step up–I don’t need these things– I just. Want. More. Of. You.

More of You Jesus

Those 4 little words from the depths of my heart make whatever circumstance, LIGHT, it loses its power, I truly cease to notice these things – their hold as I honestly pray through it surrendered in this way.

It’s taken a little time but I can see why it works- it gives me the hope, I have needed, something that lifts me  above my circumstances/m- now- in a way the promise of eternal life someday hasn’t let me. But this approach, it’s responding to the invitation, come up higher- come even deeper. – apart from this world.  And it’s. Lighting. A. FIRE!

It’s not easy, it’s hard work,  the hardest thing sometimes, and I still wrestle w it a lot- but I’ve seen the rewards. The truth is I have tried for years to live surrendered to God, but it was often hit or miss, some days I was too caught up in myself to get there, and more than that, there were certain pains or frustrations- where I couldn’t let go–but recently I found myself suddenly able w His grace to do more.  Still, THE ONLY WAY this works is because there is something I want MORE than my way etc- and that’s Him. He has my heart lol, and it gives me a sense of hope in the devastating moments– pangs- that I can cry out for Him- and more of Him is my new hope, because that is a prayer He will always answer.

Last year I was willing myself every morning to say ‘I want what You want, more than what I want…’
But now- I’ve discovered I want Him, more than anything else… even more than what I want. It’s beautiful and new. What a difference a year makes lol.

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The Things We Leave Behind

A song about letting go. 

There sits Simon
So foolishly wise
Proudly he’s tending his nets
Then Jesus calls
And the boats drift away
All that he owns he forgets

More than the nets
He abandoned that day
He found that his pride was soon drifting away
It’s hard to imagine the freedom we find
From the things we leave behind

Matthew was mindful
Of taking the tax
Pressing the people to pay
Hearing the call
He responded in faith

Followed the Light and the Way

Leaving the people
So puzzled he found
The greed in his heart
Was no longer around and
It’s hard to imagine
The freedom we find
From the things
We leave behind

Every heart needs to be set free
From posessions
That hold it so tight
‘Cause freedom’s not found in the things that we own
It’s the power
To do what is right
Jesus, our only posession
Giving becomes our delight
We can’t imagine the freedom we find
From the things we leave behind

We show a love for the world in our lives
By worshipping goods we posess

Jesus has laid all our treasures aside
“love God above all the rest”

‘Cause when we say ‘no’
To the things of the world
We open our hearts
To the love of the Lord and
Its hard to imagine

The freedom we find
From the things we leave behind

Oh, and it’s hard to imagine
The freedom we find
From the things
We leave behind

The things we leave behind – Michael Card

Give Peace

Dec 18 – to rest

Jesus inviting us into His rest and peace. Come to Me you who are weary

And I will give you REST.
Where is this rest?! It’s found ONLY in Him.
It’s drawing close to Him, who is enough for the noise, enough for the kids that don’t listen-

‘Things don’t have to be my way’- how much rest is contained in this thought!!!
His way is rest.. For it’s not the noisy kids that are disturbing my peace but rather my own inner reaction to it.

and without that pride, without that concern for self- might as well let the kids make noise for a bit 🙂

So Will I

God of creation 
There at the start

Before the beginning of time

With no point of reference

You spoke to the dark

And fleshed out the wonder of light

And as You speak

A hundred billion galaxies are born

In the vapor of Your breath the planets form

If the stars were made to worship so will I

I can see Your heart in everything You’ve made

Every burning star

A signal fire of grace

If creation sings Your praises so will I
God of Your promise

You don’t speak in vain

No syllable empty or void

For once You have spoken

All nature and science

Follow the sound of Your voice
And as You speak

A hundred billion creatures catch Your breath

Evolving in pursuit of what You said

If it all reveals Your nature so will I

I can see Your heart in everything You say

Every painted sky

A canvas of Your grace

If creation still obeys You so will I

So will I

So will I
If the stars were made to worship so will I

If the mountains bow in reverence so will I

If the oceans roar Your greatness so will I

For if everything exists to lift You high so will I

If the wind goes where You send it so will I

If the rocks cry out in silence so will I

If the sum of all our praises still falls shy

Then we’ll sing again a hundred billion times
God of salvation

You chased down my heart

Through all of my failure and pride

On a hill You created

The light of the world

Abandoned in darkness to die
And as You speak

A hundred billion failures disappear

Where You lost Your life so I could find it here

If You left the grave behind You so will I

I can see Your heart in everything You’ve done

Every part designed in a work of art called love

If You gladly chose surrender so will I

I can see Your heart

Eight billion different ways

Every precious one

A child You died to save

If You gave Your life to love them so will I

Like You would again a hundred billion times

But what measure could amount to Your desire

You’re the One who never leaves the one behind

So will I ( 100 billion X) – Hillsong United 

Infant Glory

Dec 25th
‘I did it for you. 

I did it for love!’

Love has come for us.

What more could we want?

Luke: 

8 And there were shepherds living out in the fields nearby, keeping watch over their flocks at night. 9 An angel of the Lord appeared to them, and the glory of the Lord shone around them, and they were terrified. 10 But the angel said to them, “Do not be afraid. I bring you good news that will cause great joy for all the people. 11 Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is the Messiah, the Lord. 12 This will be a sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger.”

13 Suddenly a great company of the heavenly host appeared with the angel, praising God and saying,

14 “Glory to God in the highest heaven,    and on earth peace to those on whom his favor rests.”
The heavens resound w notes of GLORY! The sound of deepest love exploding across the sky!

‘For you! For the world! For you. For you. A thousand angels are singing His love, for you. 
He comes to us, small, unthreatening, He beckons, gently, He calls out to us, from deep within our hearts and He, He is the way, the way out of all our problems, all our ruts, all our hopelessness. He comes in an instant and His first little cry, softly announces to the world, I’m here. I’m here now, it’s okay. It’s all okay now. 
He comes, small. He is not so high and mighty, not wild w super-power, rather, His love for us is so big, His heart fairly bursting just to be close to us, that He becomes one of us, w tiny feet, a face we can see, and little fingers to cup our aching broken w His tiny hands. 
The One, who never fails to show up, He never fails us at Christmas 🙂  
He is always, our one perfect present!

Because He always comes, w exactly what we need, wrapped up in SO MUCH LOVE, we would never find the end of it. 

Awake oh Sleepers!

This post from a few years ago is fresh on my heart this week, especially as we approach Christmas, the coming of the Divine Infant, and also the New Year. 

Are we making room for Him to come into our lives? He has tremendous gifts to give right now to the souls who let Him in. 

——————–
 So many souls are sleeping 

Mar 7 2014 
This passage is really coming to mind as I write and reflect today:

‘But at midnight there was a cry, ‘Behold, the bridegroom! Come out to meet him.’ 7 Then all those maidens rose and trimmed their lamps. 8 And the foolish said to the wise, ‘Give us some of your oil, for our lamps are going out.’ 9 But the wise replied, ‘Perhaps there will not be enough for us and for you; go rather to the dealers and buy for yourselves.’ 10 And while they went to buy, the bridegroom came, and those who were ready went in with him to the marriage feast; and the door was shut.

 
After confession last night I stayed for Mass, and after communion, as I began to envision Jesus there with me, in an instant I felt His Presence very strongly, and there He was, the Jesus from The Visual Gospel of Matthew that I often picture-but He wasn’t smiling as usual, instead He was deeply sorrowful. It took me by surprise, I actually put my hand to my mouth!
— Father please! They crucify me all over again! — After a moment He continued– Hearts are so cold. So shut off from Me, — Now His head was in His hands, and I felt the same–things are so bad! — that even the great shaking I have planned can not wake many of them! (I sensed this referred to the illumination but also the chaos that will precede it)
So many souls are sleeping! -They need to be woken up- and yet so many have heard the call, but are hitting the SNOOZE button! I have great treasures I want to pour into My Children (to prepare them) before the darkness comes, but souls refuse to ask for them.
–Oh, make my heart READY Lord!
After Mass I watched as a care taker snuffed the candle… It’s coming, so soon. The light of God will go out completely in the world for a time, living on only in the hearts of the faithful.
‘My children perish for lack of knowledge.’ (Hosea 4:6) The few who even hear have closed their hearts to this word. You must continue to warn them. The cost of ( your) silence is measured in souls- yours too. ( to whom much is given….)
The watchmen are weeping because the world isn’t listening. Their ears have gone dead to the words… The -“End of the World”, the “apocalypse” has been predicted and forecast like the boy who cried wolf, such that very few still have ears to hear.
From Father’s Homily, Harden not your hearts : “When we know in our heart that God is asking us to do something, we need to step out and do it! …Then, if today we hear God’s voice, ‘ have you hardened your hearts?’ We can say, no Lord, I have done what You asked.”